As I sit in my office and edit each day or when I'm returning emails, paying bills, etc., this is what I look out over my desk and see. This is part of my view. It's the spa over flowing into our pool. Back home in Indiana we would call these hot tubs. However, in Florida, they aren't hot tubs...they are "spas." Guess that is just another small reason why Naples, Florida was just ranked the 11th happiest and healthiest city to reside in nationwide by USA Today. (out of 162 cities across the country) Even their containers of water sound better. HA!
Either way, something about this small little overflow of water makes my days even better. When I look out into that turquoise mass of water and that stream from the fountain is running, it is calming to me. I eyed it up for weeks before finally deciding that it was camera worthy. I kept saying to myself..."Self, you need to get out there with the camera (a.k.a Big Papa) and take some pictures of that running fountain of peace." So...I eventually did. And these are the shots that came from that moment.
I've come to the conclusion that the reason why I love this simple fountain coming out of the spa and into the pool so much is because the spa fountain is a good analogy or educational word picture for me. It is a daily reminder that life is full of recycled events. Full of running outpours that eventually fade into the great big sea of a deep pool we call life. Streams of events that conglomerate to form one big mass of history. No matter what debris flows from that stream or what beauty sparkles from its grip...in the end, it all ends up in one grand place. In the grand scheme of life - serenaded along side other sparkling moments and other pieces of debris that ultimately get skimmed up and pulled away from the pretty. Away from the sparkling. Even though gone, the debris made the sparkling look even better. Even shinier. Even more refined. The debris and its process helped make the sparkling - the bling of life - all that it is. I heard a quote the other day from within a song called "Broken." (which is broken on my playlist below right now for some odd reason) The quote reads..."Hitting walls and getting scars only makes you who you are. No matter how much your heart is aching, there is beauty in the breaking." How unbelievably profound, eh? I have a dear friend - one of my best friends from high school - who is beginning a new chapter in her life this week. I am beyond upset that I'm not there in Indiana to ring her doorbell donning a big ol' fat pizza in my hand, a bottle of red wine for her - not me - because she loves a "good red" - all while wearing my pj's - ready for a long night of laughs, cries, and oh so important life altering girlfriend moments. I've said it before but I'll say it again...this is the time - in the era of our thirties - when we realize that our girlfriends are needed now more than ever. This is the age when our parents come down with life threatening illnesses, when marriages are battered and left for dead, when marriages end and those involved must begin new chapters, when dear friends die tragically, when we loose jobs and need to find another, when our children are growing up-putting us thru worry at times and we need to vent to another, and so forth. This list goes on and on. This is the era when girlfriends *must* step up to the plate. You know who you are. If you are the girlfriend that says..."Call me if you need me" instead of showing up and ringing their doorbell before they ever even realize that the other needs you, then you should re-evaluate how you treat and treasure your friendships. We don't get to own the title of "gur-fren" for nothing. Friendships are just like marriages. They are hard work - work that is required by two people - giving and taking when necessary. Depleting and replenishing in a fair way. A balancing act of two souls keenly in tune with one another no matter what the geographical distance.
So when your old chapters in life end and a new chapter begins - when your spa fountain runneth' over into that grand pool of life carrying debris, baggage, or better yet...bling...know that it will all recycle and begin anew no matter how ugly or how pretty. In turn, it will leave you more refined and more polished for the next cup that spills over. We will all have life events or certain individuals that are strong enough to bring us down. Make a valid effort to surround yourself with people, friends, family, etc. that are there to help you prove your strong enough to get back up. And if your on the other side of the spa fountain observing the moments of recycling for others, be sure to be the friend that "acts" rather than just "says" I'm here if you need me. I know from my own personal experiences that the ones hurting never have the energy to ask for help. They are on the floor - barely breathing - when the trenches call. It is up to us to act before they even realize they need us. If you aren't there for your *friends* when they are going thru the depths of hell...when DO you plan to be there for them?
You all know how I feel about friendships. True friends are like rare jewels. Hard to find. Hard to hold onto. Treat them as such.
And to my gur-fren back home who is beginning a new chapter of her life today...remember..."crazy is yo' friend." I love ya girl!
As I type this...my parents are standing in a funeral home at a viewing. I should be there with them but I'm not. And I'm beside myself over the fact that I'm not there. Instead I'm what feels like a million miles away - states away. They are at a viewing for the daughter of some of their best friends. It's a showing everyone has been dreading all week long. A showing for a beautiful 31 year old girl who left this earth way too soon. My parents are there to stand side by side with their friends in support of them as they endure the tragic death of their daughter, my childhood friend. They are there - knowing that there are no words they can say and no actions that they can take to make this any easier for her parents. But they are there because that is what friends do. That is what friends are for. They wouldn't have it any other way. It makes me sick to my stomach that I'm not there to give each of them a hug. A huge embrace. Instead, I'm sitting here - looking at the cotton candy skies in Florida - praying incessantly for their peace and strength tonight. It's the only thing I know to do. God is the one and only solitary answer to all of this anguish.
A couple of years back, I was asked to stand up and give a simple prayer at my Grandfathers funeral. As nervous as I was, the moment eventually came. Ironically, as I rose to my feet in front of the many faces in attendance to say the prayer, I slowed down just long enough to gaze out at the faces in that room that day. As I scanned the crowd, I saw only sets and sets of familiar individuals. Friends. Friends of my Dad and Cathy's actually. Their friends whom I had grown up around as a young girl and whom were there at the funeral in support of Cathy when her father passed. I immediately felt a sense of comfort when I looked out at them. They were dear friends to me now as well - to me as an adult. I was no longer this 7, 10, 15, or 20 year old little girl. I was in my thirties and they were "still" there. Still around. Still friends with my parents. There is a huge group of them - all who went to school together really. They've stuck together like glue since as long as I can remember. And tonight...they are stuck together like glue again - surrounding the casket of one of their best friends daughters.
I remember thanking that group before my prayer that day a few years back. I thanked them for being there for my parents during that difficult time when my Grandfather passed unexpectedly. I told them that they had been there for my family for as long as I could remember and that they were the epitome' of true friends. They were what REAL friends look like. I thanked them for loving my parents and for always being there-by their side. It was such a comforting feeling to know that although I was nervous over being asked to say a small silly prayer in a room full of people, I was amongst friends. Friends whom are like family to me. Friends who ARE family to my Dad and Cathy. Tonight those friends and my Dad and Cathy are back at another funeral home. Standing as a family in support of those who are in agonizing pain over Krissy's death. They have all been thru so much together but tonight's events and the burial tomorrow morning will undoubtedly be one of the most trying and painful situations they've all encountered together thus far.
As I walked the beach today with my Mom, I said many prayers for all of them but especially for Krissy's parents and her brother. The clock was like a ticking time bomb to me as I watched it count down the hours to when the showing/viewing was set to begin. I tried and tried to put it out of my mind but it was far too difficult. They are hurting. We are hurting. Life is just not fair. My only peace is staring at the skies tonight and being envious that Krissy has wings and can soar with the heavens for eternity now.
Call up your parents tonight and tell them you love them. I did. I let my Dad know before he walked into that funeral home how much I am blessed to have him as my Father. As my Dad. Then...text, call, or email your best friend(s) and tell them what they mean to you. Ask them if they are OK in life. And most of all...hug your children. Hug them tightly - even if they are adult children. If you can't get close enough for a hug...call and check in on them. Life is too short. When I look back on that old picture below of Krissy and I with her brother as kids, I'm saddened at the thought that I had no idea just how numbered her days on this earth were back then. How little she would get to live out life. How young she would be when she left us. I am so very thankful to have known her and to have had the moments with her that I did back then. Friends. Call them. Hug them. Support them. Encourage them. Love them.
It's 12:20pm and I'm still in my big, baggy, sweatshirt and my sweats. This is what happens when you spend a great night out with new friends last night. I think Brent and I rolled our butts into bed at about 1am this morning. Needless to say, I'm too old for this type of behavior and am now dragging and paying the price for it today. Funny thing is, we just went downtown for dinner and then came back to our house and chatted it up after that. We didn't do any partying or dancing on the tables as Brent might be typically capable of. (HA! Just kidding babe!) It was just a calm but oh so fun night of laughter with friends. Meet Scott and Christina. They are, as I mentioned yesterday, from California. Christina was a customer/client of mine back about 3 years ago when I first began sewing. I laughed last night and talked about what a scary thought it was that she purchased a boutique set from me back when I first began sewing. Gosh only knows what the pitiful looking set looked like at that time. Hee hee! Luckily, Christina stayed close by and wasn't scared off by my newbie abilities as a brand new seamstress all those years ago. She is now an avid AGD blog reader and friend. This was Scott's 2nd trip to Indiana and Christina's first. They are contemplating a move here later on and were in town to check out the schools, areas, shopping - wink Christina ;) etc. Beings that they live next to Orange County, Hoosier land is a BIG and I mean a BIG switch from their hometown. However, after talking with Christina many times and hearing their reasoning for it again last night, the move here stems around their future and the future they want for their children. Like Brent told them last night, Indiana "IS" a great place to raise your kids. I agree.
Being a Hoosier is a much slower pace than CA living. I think that Scott and Christina are craving that part of Indiana. We hope that their decision comes smooth and easy for them and that God's will shall be done when weighing out their options to stay there or move here. If God should lead them to Indy, Brent and I will be here with open arms. Being two self-employed business owners, Scott and Brent really hit it off. It's always grand to find your husband bonding with your girl-friends husband. Nothing like having things in common with another couple your age. So...thanks again for hanging with the Seaman Clan last night Scott and Christina. We had a great evening and look forward to doing it again sometime soon - God willing. We pray your flight back home was a smooth one this morning and that you are still alive after dancin' on all those tables and "chasing penquins" till' wee hours of the morning last night. Right Brentster? HA! Just kiddddeeeennnnnnnn'!
Hugs, Angie & Brent
PS...Thanks to my sweet mother in law, Debbie, for snapping the shot above for us.
PSS...To all of you hounding me about wanting a picture of me on the blog again recently....there you go! We are good for another 6 months. ;) Funny thing is, Brent and I always seem to be wearing the same black shirts anytime we do jump into a picture. What's up with that, eh?
So...thanks again for hanging with the Seaman Clan last night Scott and Christina. We had a great evening and look forward to doing it again sometime soon - God willing. We pray your flight back home was a smooth one this morning and that you are still alive after dancin' on all those tables and "chasing penquins" till' wee hours of the morning last night. Right Brentster? HA! Just kiddddeeeennnnnnnn'!